Calgon, take me away!

     Oh, please make it stop!  Please, make the voice go away!  No, I'm not talking about a voice in my head.  It's that one voice that is in every room I go into.  I swear it is following me.  Oh, wait!  It is following me.  I cannot even get away from it in the bathroom.  It stands right outside the door and continues with the mind-numbing chatter.  Okay, I probably shouldn't call My Swimmer "it", but my mind is going numb.  She has been babbling on for an hour and a half now.   I am not kidding!  All I have said is, "hmm", "oh", "uh-huh".  It doesn't matter if I leave the room she just keeps following me!  I'm not sure how she can just keep talking.  If it was anything worth listening to, I wouldn't mind so much.  I just can't handle the, "and then so-and-so said . . . and then I said . . . so then whatsherbucket said . . . and then we went to . . . and then we went to . . . and we saw whoosie-whatsit . . . and then . . ."  It's like reading the most poorly written book ever.  It just goes on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on without any punctuation!  Please, someone throw her a comma!!!!
     Oh, wow!  Bliss! My joy was full at that most beautiful of all beautiful poetry.  I am ecstatic over the one simple phrase, "Okay, I think I'm really going to bed now."  Just when I was on the verge of saying something besides "hmm," "oh," and "uh-huh"; something I would probably regret like "the S word",  Yes, I was actually on the verge of saying, "Shut up!"  But now, I don't have to say it.  What a tender mercy!  Silence you are my favorite companion!  Oh happy day!  I feel like breaking into the Hallelujah Chorus.  (Speaking of the Hallelujah Chorus, have you seen this?  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZCFCeJTEzNU&noredirect=1  I love this!  I had to go watch it again just now.
     I know that I should be grateful because when she's talking to me I know My Swimmer is not making major bad choices.  When she doesn't talk to me she's usually done something pretty bad and she's mad at me for it.  (It doesn't make sense to me either.)  Then the silence is not so golden.  So her talking to me is a really good thing, but for an hour and a half?  Seriously?  I guess I'll just look forward to the day when my partial hearing loss is no longer partial!  Dad, I envy your ability to turn off your hearing aid and shut out the noise!